How to Quit Relying Too Much on Your Stress

In experience as a clinical psychologist with a focus on mindfulness-based behavioral therapies, a large number of patients exhibit perseverative cognition—a fancy term for obsessive-compulsive thinking and worrying. And while it’s simple to think that this way of thinking will help us cope with stress better, research indicates that, in fact, it makes acute stress—the way react to a single, discrete event or situation—more prolonged because we’re taking something transient and extending it needlessly.

According to Penn State University research, when people are asked to recall an intense experience, even if it happened decades ago, their bodies relive the entire effect of the incident, causing a real-time surge in blood pressure. Venting our frustrations nonstop is another way keep concerns at the forefront of our minds. It makes sense that the habit associates upsetting experiences with the negative effects of long-term stress as perseverative cognition recreates all the tension associated with previous difficulties.

The good news is that, whether it’s a persistent issue at work or a personal disagreement, you can put difficult matters that you can’t instantly address aside by honing your ability to stay present. Psychologist George Slavich, a professor at the University of California, Los Angeles and director of the Laboratory for Stress Assessment and Research, says that stresses can be acute or persistent and have an affect on a person’s life.

Four Techniques to Assist You in Taking a Stress Relief Break

Establish a solid foundation

The next time your thoughts start to spiral out of control, stop and feel the pressure of your feet on the ground. Then, think about:

For instance, anchoring can help you catch yourself when you’re getting ready for bed and thinking about tomorrow’s schedule and the hectic day ahead, preventing you from working yourself into a sleep-depriving state of mind. It is after all more difficult to function in the morning when you are sleep deprived. This anchoring approach helps illnesses like melancholy and anxiety that can be caused by overthinking. It is part of a research-based program called the Unified Protocol, which was developed by Dr. David Barlow, an emeritus professor at Boston University, and his colleagues. Anchoring is a simple and easy approach to bring consciousness to where you are, and you can practice it several times a day. Of course, it requires work and willingness.

Don’t be so serious about your thoughts

Too often, the majority of our self-perception is unhelpful and disempowering. Therefore, one can intentionally generate some distance and perspective from those thoughts while taking them less seriously by using cognitive defusion, which is taking thoughts less literally, as opposed to enabling those thoughts to feel like dictators in one’s life.

Don’t be so serious about your thoughts

Too often, the majority of self-perception is unhelpful and disempowering. Therefore, one can intentionally generate some distance and perspective from those thoughts while taking them less seriously by using cognitive defusion, which is taking thoughts less literally, as opposed to enabling those thoughts to feel like dictators in one’s life.

Sit in doubtful

One of the things that makes it so alluring to ruminate is the delusion that by going over every possible worst-case scenario, you’ll be able to foresee and steer clear of them, which will ultimately make you feel less anxious. Ironically, though, a lack of tolerance for ambiguity is a predisposing factor for anxiety and other psychiatric issues.

Confirm your own validity

Overthinking is often fueled by unresolved conflicts with the individuals one encounters on a regular basis. You may find yourself in a situation where a potential employer ghosts you after several rounds of interviews, or a customer offends you in a way that you are unable to handle. To have the dialogue you wish you could have had, you could find yourself mentally reliving the incident, complete with your own furious reactions.